Wouldn’t it be nice if you were sitting having breakfast with me now? This sentence is not an organic one, but man-made on recommendation from a self-help/law of attraction audio book. Apparently saying this sentence aligns my energy so beautifully with your energy as I spend a moment experiencing you with me now. Because, after all the feeling is the prayer hey? Asking for you to be here means I feel lack, whereas having a quick fantasy of you being here just confirms the inevitable, as if I’m a wizard living my life backwards. Know what I mean? Well it would be nice if you were having breakfast with me and I look forward to the many breakfasts we’ll share.
I hope you don’t mind, but our breakfast today was not destined to just be the two of us, my friend Linx who is on a bit of a losing spell with domestic pets joined me for our usual spontaneous catch ups. “Coffee on the couch?” came her sms. I do love my life! Although there is the occasional financial stress, (which by the way I see you as a financial vision of stability and abundance and the end of any financial concerns in my life!!!), I always have an abundance of time whilst still having a productive and colourful day. Most of the time I manage to slip in a coffee and pep talk with a mate in the day. Some days I only manage to slip in an increment of work-work, but I consider my networking and building it as vital to my current and upcoming position in this community. Impressed? Don’t worry, I don’t anticipate that you just gonna swallow my BS.
So yes, indeed it would be wonderful if you were here today. You’d get the best of me! I’m in a particularly festive mood, optimism is but the canvas of my cherry disposition. You know the mood I get into when I feel that everything is going my way and it is not only safe to trust my hunches, but unnecessary to ever, ever doubt them again? I get like this when I have recently tasted the confirmation that life supports me and I thus can support my life, my dreams and projects etc. It’s a little bit different to when I’m scratching the bottom of the hat looking for the frikken rabbit. That is when I go into a zone that if you and I had met already, I firstly wouldn’t be in this position, and secondly, wouldn’t be doing it ALONE! I know, very dramatic, but in moments like that I swim deep in abandonment. I do of course know that I will have the realisation one day that my financial situation has pretty little to do with you. An outsider at this time might well say it is obvious as (whisper) you aren’t here yet, and my unstable emotionally abusive relationship with money is, but at least I can blame it on you not being here surely?
The good mood is a product of quite a few exciting progressions, which you’ll notice I keep a steady supply of in my life. C and I are opening our bank account for The Baby House this afternoon. This is not just a formality, but a milestone. It means that we have jumped through the necessary hoops of registration, creating sufficient belief to set up a committee and fundraised sufficiently to have some cash to actually open the account with. Most excitingly, it means that there is a designated place, in our name, that monthly dedications can flow into so that we can open our place of safety for babies....it is a big one babe! And I’m walking into this next chapter armoured with enough faith to move mountains. I secretly think that my faith in life is something you’ll find attractive initially and essential eventually. My faith isn’t blind, it is based on a complex inner language of feelings and senses that I can’t really explain to anyone, but over the years have learned to read like my mother tongue.
Your wife. X
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